Sunday, September 20, 2009
Culture of Blame
I was always taught that if you want something , you need to work hard, and then maybe, just maybe, you will attain it. It did not matter what the 'it' was. You want to play basketball? There is the ball, and over there is the hoop. Get going. You want that 'A' on your report card? Do your schoolwork. Ask your teachers for help if you need it.
But even with my effort, I understood that there were no guarantees. I might start varsity basketball, I might get that 'A'....or I might not. Someone else might have worked harder, or maybe was just more talented, and deserved the spot on varsity. Just because I studied for Calculus, that doesn't mean that I mastered the concept enough for an 'A'. No guarantees.
It seems more and more every day that people expect things to be handed to them, just because. If you do not get something that you want, well then it must be the fault of someone else, right? It couldn't be that you weren't deserving, that maybe you didn't earn what you wanted?
This video from PJTV delivers this message much better than I ever could. It is long, but worth it. SILENT NO MORE!!!
As for our children, my husband and I agree that they will be taught that they must work for what they want. Working hard will give them a sense of pride and ownership in what they achieve. It will also teach them that sometimes the outcome is not what you wanted or expected, even though you tried your hardest. You can't always be the best, or always get what you want, but you can't get there by giving less than full effort.